SO WHAT

The A levels are over. I dont really feel anything though. I dont know, after the O's I was so hugely relieved and excited about the end of the exams right, but for A levels it doesnt really feel all that great. Maybe its because I've been through it before, I really dont know. Anyways I guess I should analyze all the papers and maybe when I get my results I can come back to this post and go "YEAH, ok" ...

1. GP - Actually I'm secretly scared of something I might have forgotten to do in paper 1, because the question was "does technology ALWAYS improve the quality of people's lives" right, I'm not sure if I answered the qualifier, the ALWAYS part, or actually I think I forgot whether I did answer it. I hope I did lol. But anyways I kinda geared my essay in the direction of "its obviously not always" so yeah. Faith. Paper 2 was quite fun.

2. Math P1 - By cambridge standards the paper wasnt easy. I think its one of the hardest A level math papers set by cambridge ever. But who cares cause by AC internal exams standards its like free frag.

3. Chem P3 - Whoa I've been dreading this paper. God was particularly good to me that day, all the answers I guessed were tycolly correct and I only made 1 real mistake which I really regret in the entire paper.

4. Math P2 - NO KICK

5. Physics P1 and 2 - P1 was NO KICK, after all the prelim papers I did it was pretty free frag too. Only made 1 careless mistake which I regret. P2 was killer. Also this year I think we saw one of the hardest physics papers papers set by cambridge. I forsee many casualties in physics this year.

6. Chem P2 - NO KICK. tycolly guessed about 5 marks correctly again in this paper god's grace is truly amazing :)

7. Physics P3 - Utterly non- standard. I dont know whats up with all these people thinking they did well for physics p3. I mean I didnt think it was that bad too, until i saw Mr Khor. If Mr Khor looks troubled after the paper, all the physics students in Singapore better be worried. And chang was telling me about how ownage the paper was too. Too many of the main stayers in the Physics didnt even come out this year, like EMI and Quantum. To the astute student, those are often also the questions which give students their marks. Its such a pity, as a school we have worked so hard for physics, 2 mock exams and countless hours of Mr Khor screaming at us. Now I guess we just have to take comfort in the fact that the entire country screwed it up and pray hard for gosu moderation.

ONE DAY BREAK STONE IN SCHOOL AND DREAM ABOUT LIFE AFTER A LEVELS

8. Chem P1 - One tricky bitch it was. I havent really analyzed this paper but from outside exam hall chatter i made 2 careless mistakes so far :( but i believe it'll be ok cause god is damn GOSU.



Life after the A levels is pretty boring. After having so many things to do in 2 years, I kinda dread having nothing to do now. Its so weird to wake up in the morning and not have anything to rush. Ah well i guess when everyone else finishes their exams it will be more fun. We can go put the chang jie MAN U plan into action and etc.

In other news, I owned qing in pool yesterday. He is such a noob, all that mugging for A levels has made qing a noob and gay guy. But qing was always noob and gay la hahahahah

In other other news, GY has bought a Razor Krait mouse and a Razor Exactmat. We have yet to see how they have improved his game (lol)

In other other other news, while gargling my mouth with listerine this morning i accidentaly swallowed half a mouthful of it. It was damn hot and I think it mixed with my breakfast to own my stomach cause im still having a stomach ache now and i feel like vomitting argh PAIN PAIN.

Im also starting my caffeine detox program! After having 2-3 cups a day for 3 months I am now down to like 1 every 2 days. But I feel quite tired without coffee :( My right eye has also stopped twitching since the level of caffiene in my blood has dropped.

More updates soon! I just realized I still havent uploaded Baccalaureate pictures haha

so my daily conversations with God go something like:
"hey God, A levels are damn scary"
"yes sonny, have faith, be strong"
"ok father, but im still very scared of chem"
"well thats cause you decided to fool around all this while innit"
"can i take physics and maths now? so i can get over it, i hate waiting, but i wanna take chem in 3 months time"
"whats your problem? i have 10000 other prayers to answer you know"
amen.

so my conversations with God are very healthy and i always learn something out of every one. dont ask me how i hear him. i guess we all can, in our hearts. frequently, when we are in the exam hall waiting for the paper to begin, i close my eyes and pray too. when i can hear Him, i know it'll all be ok.

Chemistry is like this big leap of faith for me, just that the hangtime is going to be about 4 months. as oppsed to the usual leaps we take in which we take moments to land again right. and the longer you stay in the air, no more doubts you have, you wonder how you're going to land, you wonder if you're going to land.
its so horrible
its so scary.

well, in other news, saddam is going to hang. i dont know why but i feel a tinge of sadness. i mean, he's been like such a big part all these world events and etc, then suddenly he has 30 days left to live unless his appeal is successful. why dont they just imprison him for life? i've always thought that the death penalty was damn messed. its so final, because once you're dead thats it.

heres where i end. i doubt there'll be another update till the end of my exams. until then, we should all pray, hard. through him, we will be more than conquerors.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God" - Philippians 4:6

The LORD is my light and my salvation,
whom shall i fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life,
of whom shall i be afraid?
-Psalm 27:1

so like a central theme of war poetry is cartharsis right. but then like, jc2 people also need their own carthartic ways to de-stress right. so like:

IM DAMN SCARED I CANNOT GET 3A's

PCB. PCBPCBPCB its like im damn scared of getting complacent right, cause thats what i let happen to me for the prelims. im particularly scared for chem, its my most shaky subject, although im improving, im quite sure if they hit me with a well placed question to screw up my thought process they'll own my entire paper.

even at the peak of my O level revision, i didnt feel like i could get 6 points. but now its different, my target is within reach, but i must own the paper properly. im not too sure if i prefer a hard paper or an easy paper though. cause like chang said, if they set a hard paper its better cause those w_f_s (must watch what we say now people getting raped for voicing their views on elitism) peeps will mess it up and we can take our rightful places in the normal distribution chart.

yeah, exams start next week. at this point its like exactly 3 weeks till the end of the A levels. its going to pass too quickly for my liking. oh yeah, i've been telling people that i want to buy a crumpler bag after A's, like a huge one. everyone i have told keeps on telling me its so poser and gay, but like, i think its quite cool what. especially since after A's i wont have to carry books around anymore so like i dont think ill ever carry a backpack again.

must focus,
must concentrate,
must own.
oh yes, i can see it. the future looks good.
or at least at this point, haha

today we went back to school to study.
the entire school was locked, the only place to study was the void deck and canteen. unfortunately, like all void decks and canteens, it was smelly and gay so i couldnt study there. but that wasnt a problem, cause i went with su and zheng hao to nl ten and we (or i, because su was being a wuss) jacked it.

anyways we discovered that wong's classroom was as clean as he left it the last time, so it was almost as pleasent studying there was it would have been in the canteen with the bird droppings and 3 days old chicken rice. so we did some work. then su started being gay with the air con, and i found a giant ant, and zheng hao finished his chem paper so we started to waste time by helping su to gay with the air con. then we found out that someone had accidentaly jacked the hub too, according to su someone got thrown onto the hub door and the door open upon impact. yeah, so next time i wont bother to do mission impossible 4 to jack the north lodge (we'll just throw su into the door repeatedly until it breaks).

then at 6pm su realized that he hasnt had his daily wank so he went home to relieve himself. and zheng hao left also because i made him pay $6.10 for one burger. but it was true ok, the bloody burger was $6.10, i didnt even know it costs that much. seriously BK shouldnt be so gay about their double whoppers with chesse, i mean it only weighs like 1kg right.

i got my enlistment letter today. im not a policeman, i can go ocs, but im in t3h OLD SCHOOL. and 12 april seems like an awfully long time to wait to get my first taste of being owned by some ite drop out coporal with half the intelligience of a cactus.

chang jie is bugging me, he is gay, stupid, and gay. i know he will read this so i might as well type something to piss him off. but i think chang jie might be able to get like one S paper disctinction, tycolly. and chang jie is damn pro in dota also, but dota seems so historic because i havent played it for so long.

theres only like 4 weeks left till the end of A levels. how quick, but like i know why since i studied physics. its like relativistic. cause like, einstein said that and einstein says everything that he says is true so when he said that chang jie was gay, stupid, and gay he meant it too. ok wtf am i talking about, i shall go back to study.

3.1 GOOD STUDY HAVEN

ok i lied, since i reformatted my computer i havent had time to install the program to upload pics from my cybershot so i cant post the baccalaureate photos yet :(

so i've spent most of the week mugging for about 14 hours a day in school. theres this empty classroom, 3.1, which i particularly like studying in. its like the 2ad1 form class and its always empty and the location is just nice, like the void deck and library are so accessible from there. and theres no noisy people like in the hub! but then again sometimes when im in the hub i make quite a lot of noise too. i guess its a hub thing, mugging there leads to talking which leads to more unproductive stuff like (exploring the school at 9pm with all the lights out).

yeah, su and chang are so adventurous and pioneering, they particularly enjoy roaming the school with all the lights out 10 days before the most important exam of their lives. but seriously, maybe end october is not the most urgent time to explore level 7 toilets...

in other news, im finally ranked to captain on area00! if u guys dont know, area00 is a damn fun game to replace dota with cause it only takes up 3mins a day and you get so sick of clicking that after 3mins you go back to your nov 2003 maths paper 2 question 5bii.
ABER:


yeah. you guys can start to make your accounts on korea server too! cause su and i have this uber plan to like OWN the area00 world after A's. how exciting. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

um, im enlisting in march. so im most probably going back to relief teach in barker. it would be quite fun. and enriching. and fulfilling. but im not too sure if their have vacancies, and if there are better alternatives than teaching rowdy, violent boys whom i once resembled. yeah, whatever, back to mugging now before f1 qualifying later at 12! (yes f1 qualifying is at midnight today damn sian)

ACS

you see, ac is a bloody hax school right from the very start. the only way to get into the primary school is to either stay 5m away from the actual school, or to have a parent who had graduated from an acs related institution before. so in good ol' 94, my father enrolled me in what he thought would be the best education for his son, since he himself had received it.

so in primary 1 i walked into my classroom in the first level of the clocktower block in the barker road campus with some sort of apprehension, unsure of what the school held ahead for me. it was pretty thrilling though, being such young kids, and the campus so old and huge, we would spend recesses trying to explore the school, play catching but never finish the game because of the sheer size of the compound, or dare each other to run up the spooky clocktower staircase. haha, it was a pretty fun childhood. acps also shared the campus with the secondary section, acs (barker). even when i was 7, when i looked at the way those guys behaved, i kinda made up my mind not to continue in that school. little did i know that 6 years later, it would be the very school i had entered. maybe instead of playing catching, i should have studied a little harder.

but barker wasnt as bad as i thought it would be. if anything, it transformed me. it taught me faith, it thought me to dream, and to hope. although i cant testify much about the "value added"-ness of the school, because academically, i decreased in value, i can say i learnt much more than math and english in that school. acs barker was also the place where my relationshop with god grew. in primary school, i would attend chapel and listen to devotions, but not really appreciate what was being shared. perhaps it was how god gave me so many chances in those four years, and so much hope. barker was also the placed i met my best friends, the ones i could really trust, the ones whom i know wouldnt desert me for all the money in the world( but probably for a dota game they would). i met 4a3, the best class i could ever wish for (until 2se1?), 4a3 was a bloody good experience, ill remember those boys forever.

acjc was a different experience altogether. i mean like suddenly, CO-ED. damn scary, i suppose we were all suddenly very self conscious, but in time we all got used to it. of course, being from barker, we all had to get used to paying attention and cutting our hair. but it was all good for us. if barker created me, acjc refined me. meeting the acsi guys were a shock. i mean, we were primary school friends after all. how could 2 schools stand for the same values, but yet be so far apart? academically? in terms of student behaviour? public opinion? i seemed to be blessed with being put in great classes. i met 2se1, 2se1 are a great bunch of people, if you take away one of us, you wont have a complete class. these folks made my acjc experience complete, they make my want to go to class daily, cause its so damn fun. im sure we'll all do well for our A levels :)

when good ol oldham made acs in 18 something (its too long ago i forgot), i daresay he never expected it to expand into an entire family of 6 schools. but acs is not just an institution, thats too empty a word. acs is an identity, every person who passes through its gates will learn something from that experience. every boy who's life its changed will forever have the values the school stands for deeply imbued within him.

i know it sounds damn corny, this school has changed my life, its made me who i am. because its the only school i know. i also know there'll always be people like zhihuan who hate the school as much as we love it, but at least we know why. you can also find these breed of people in acjc, unhappy, disgruntled, full of hate, these are the people who dont want to be here. oh yes, you'd be suprised, so many kids appeal every year trying to get in, yet there are people within the school who hate it. they'll never find their place in our culture, because they didnt want to.

im damn freaking proud of this heritage. and im gonna preserve it as long as i can, even after i leave the school.

:) cheers and happy baccalaureate

next post on pictures taken tmr!

you see in every acs school that i've been to, i've received honours at least once. or at least that was so until i came to acjc. but seriously, my cca endeavours in this school are really pretty messed up haha. but i guess i just have to make up for it by going on stage one last time, the only time it matters.

some guys have started to receive their enlistment letters. i haven't gotten mine yet. actually i kinda hope i enlist in april, i'd fancy the free time to do things which i really wanted to do. like maybe go to cambodia and help the children, then step on a land mine and lose a few limbs, get downgraded and work as a clerk in the army. not a bad life eh? except i reckon the land mine part might hurt pretty bad.

i think about half my class are pes c and below. so they can slack off and play dota for 2 years, quite fun. but i was thinking about it, being a clerk has so many more merits. like going home everyday to see your parents and watch your pet cactus grow. and like if you only work 9 to 5 then at least you wont be so worried about your gf running off with some poly guy while you're trekking through the jungles of borneo, sweaty, exhausted, tired, with just the thought of her keeping you going. haha, very ironic, but thats just my imagination (life is more cruel, she'll run off with landon su). so i guess we should all turn gay cause then our gay partners will be there with us in borneo too. haha

um, school's ending, my next post shall be on that. 12 years in acs is quite hard to put into words, i guess im gonna need some time to compose all that. but in the mean time, study study study!

HAZE

ABER
ABER
ABER
WHY CANT I SEE ANYTHING?

its damn hard to breathe, how to study? its so foggy, i cant read my notes.
the haze got damn f-ed up today. im like almost choking already.

but then again, not being able to see anything is sometimes good. ignorance is so much better than knowledge.

i had this great, long post planned so well in my head earlier today. but in the end it came to naught because im too tired/ suffocated/ troubled/ worried to properly think now.
i guess i need some sleep

oh shit. dx's msn nick is scaring the hell out of me. 38 days left to A levels. ok, typing that made me suddenly want to mug now. so i guess i have to end here, hahahaha

ok i think i got over my prelims. so i think im ready to talk about it now. i've thought it all out, lying in my bed on friday night, unable to sleep until 4am. i think god wants me to mug more, i know that sometimes im really quite slack. if i want to do well, i should devote every waking hour to mugging, and not just waste time chatting on the phone or thinking about my lost love dota.

actually, i think doing countless prelim mcq papers kinda contributed to my mess up too. like after doing so many mcq's, im too used to working things out quickly and taking shortcuts. not showing adequete working and stuff. even so, i dont think ill ever in this life of mine be able to accept the fact that i mugged so hard for physics, and still screwed up. but i guess for prelims, effort doesnt equate to results.

when i first got the papers back, i felt this rush of hate towards the entire physics department. why did they have to mark so strictly and be so picky? why didnt they appreciate the effort that i put in? but now i know, they want us to realize many things, that our answers must be well organized, we must know what the examiner wants us to see from that question, because examiners are essentially dumb, therefore we have to show every single small formula, step, equation, proof, definition, statement, SI unit, diagram and whatever other thing we learnt in the first 5 minutes of each lecture (before we fall asleep) this 2 years.

i must say im not looking forward to the end of the A levels. you see, while peeps like dx are busy counting the days left to the start of A levels, im counting the days left to the end. its a kind of dread to realize that my 12 years of schooling have gone by so fast, and that there are less days left to my NS enlistment than i had to mug for A levels. haha, time to get back to the books. i know god will not forsake me, as will he not to the many other friends i have in ac who have done badly. he will honour our hard work.

ok la i realize that i was stupid. god has a reason for putting me through all this shit. i will continue working hard, he will not forsake me.

MUG

ok please pardon me for using the f word in this post, im really quite pissed off. you see, i spent so much bloody time doing physics in the entire month before the prelims. after doing like 3 papers a week and all that shit, all i get is some shit score. then for my fucking chemistry, i didnt even study at all, i did like an infinite amount more physics than chemistry. and my chem grade can still beat my phyiscs? i mean like WTF lar. why didnt my effort equate to my eventual score? this sucks.

what is god doing to me? i thought he would at least reward all my fucking effort for physics in some way. FUCK

oh shit, i need to cool off

first day of the last term of school :(
today, i was reminded how little time i have left in this school. im so gonna miss all the fun and good times i've had, if only i could stay in ac foreverrrrrr. but i know i have to move on, there are greater things to accomplish for God's glory.

to commemorate this day, we took stupid photos

lihao's and my first chem lecture in about 3 months. you see, we found the opportunity cost of attending chem lec too high, we could done much more productive work in the library. behind us is the rare sighting of clemens paying attention. in the background there are random classmates being studious, zheng hao wondering what we're doing, and yeecheng's hairband.

at this point, clemens got bored of the chem lecture too. but the reflection from the lights above spoilt the photo.

waiting for gp class to start.

ok la the following picture wasnt taken today but i decided to upload it anyways cause i found it in my phone.

a happier day:)
those were the days, when the prelims still seemed far away.
now, the road to the A's lies stark ahead of us.
a road which we have no choice but to travel.
but then again, i love this road. hahah

at first, frostbite didnt seem like such a bad movie. only that it was in swedish and we had to read the english subtitles for the entire duration of the movie. but at least there was a hot swedish chick as the female lead, even though she had a swedish name that sounded retarded, saga. who the hell will call anything saga? wtf. but anyways it had all the makings of a cool vampire show where the heroes slay the vampires in the end. until the idiot director decided it was cooler to turn the entire town into vampires, and so he did. sigh, if that show had a dawn of the dead kind of ending, maybe it wouldnt have been so dumb.

swenson's coffee sucks. i had the worst latte in my life last night at the PS swensons. i mean, if you know that your coffee sucks then maybe you shouldnt go and charge people $3.90 for a small cup of it wtf!!!

um, i started mugging. its pretty fun to do mcq's actually. but im just worried ill burn out too fast. dunno, daryl told me that dk told his class to slack off for the entire hols, because next term was going to be uber hardKHOR. but he didnt tell my class anything, so i guess we are allowed to mug during the hols. haha.

so since i've officially quit dota last sunday night, i have loads of free time now. im not exactly spending all my free time mugging, but im doing more meaningful things with my time. like in the past few days, i've read a lot of random things, its pretty fun to read these kinda stuff and just broaden our minds. like for physics, i was reading about maxwell's equations and light, and einstein's relativity. omg i dont know why we're not learning that for A level physics lor, you can only truly appreciate einstein's gennius if you see what he did in relativity. and maxwell, omg another genius not allowed to display his findings to generations of JC students.

my heart cries out for them.

haha i changed address, i've always thought singwhenitrains sounded damn gay, but i never really got the chance to change it.

so while thinking of a new address, i consulted sean ng and he told me that i was asking for suggestions because i dont know who i am, thats why i cant think of a proper name for my blog. then he proceeded to suggest a gay address "searchingfortheanswer.blogspot" since i was searching for my own identity. yeah, great help he was.

then later that day, i realized that actually there was a unique word that people would associate with my name. STYUIOP. hahaha, my email since primary 2 beat that bitch! so when people see styuiop, they think of ST. therefore ST's blog should be STyuiop. then i called qing, and qing told me he reckoned it was a good idea to change it to styuiop too, which made me have second thoughts about it cause qing's good ideas are always bad.

but anyways, i still changed it. so there you go, something new to type in the address bar when you want to get to my blog. but then again i know that most of u lazy people get linked here from class blog or something.

the break on friday was pretty good, i just dotaed the entire day and got pissed off enough with zhihuan to run to his house to throttle him until i realized that asshole doesnt have one and i'll probably get throttled instead since he knows how to fight karate or some bullshit now. ah well, ill just wait till they legalize firearms cause no matter how many ha dou ken's you can do, you cant stop my bullet. HAHAHA.

yesterday was supposed to be the buffer day, you know, like when i try start mugging again i need time to get used to it, but in the end i just ended up boozing at hog's breath cafe and watching man u get owned by wharton. hog's breath not bad la, except they dont serve heineken like wtf....

theres F1 later, 2 ferrari's followed by 2 renaults in the first starting positions! how fun.

prelims are suddenly not so fun anymore.

i had never thought that i would ever feel stressed out this year. or at least, not so soon. but last night, while mugging for physics, i had my first real taste of stress. that horrible, sick feeling you get when you're under too much pressure, when theres so much to do but so little time left to do it with. and you're so helpless because you cant do anything about it and no one can save you from this unbearable, pressing load. that feeling sucks. i remember towards the end of sec4, i felt like that every single day. shit, i hated it.

at least im glad the written papers are all over, just chem mcq left to mug for :)

tomorrow, im going to take the whole day off just to chill at home, i think i deserve it. i havent had proper, undisturbed sleep for weeks now. i really need this break, no matter how short it is.

now i know what the A levels are really like, and i used to think those suicide/drop out rates were ridiculous because of all the fun i was having in ac. hah

and even when your hope is gone
move along, move along
just to make it through.

MUSTS

tomorrow, i must have my coffee in the morning,
i must be alert.
i must not be over-confident,
nor too unsure of myself.
pray before the exam,
and again after.

i invested too much to screw up tomorrow, i must not

haha sorry something happened in the previous post about the "grading system", it didnt come out as expected, but i editted it already so its fine now.

so the prelims have started, its horrible. i dont want to talk about it. i really dont understand why they make the prelim papers so bloody hard. i mean, since i did like 20 physics paper 1's, i personally know that you can score higher for the rj, hc, vj and nj papers than for the ac papers. how gay is that huh? and its not even like we do better than them for A levels.

yeah, i really hope i can get CEE un-moderated. i mean like i actually put in effort for these exams, i havent mugged for damn long, like since sec 4. so it would be nice to see some fruits during prelims, even if they arent like uber ripe yet. if you get what i mean. haha

Mugging!


yesterday's mugging/coffee intoxication session was damn hardcore, after chem tuition in the morning we went to holland v starbucks where i drank a large brazillian cherrado or something. then we went for physics for another hour and a half, followed by more coffee at holland v coffee bean. so i drank about one litre of coffee altogether, mmmmmm ownage.

so the prelims are almost here, like the days left to prelims are less than the number of cups of coffee i have a day. everybody is proficient in at least one subject now, but for most of the people i know its like physics (because almost the entire level has physics tuition now). a lot of physics takers i know also screwed their chem revision big time. many conversations with many people tell me our timetable after prelims will consist of about 4hours of chem tutorials a day. haha.

so for the people who were slacking too much dont even know the A level grading system, i will sacrifice some of my important mathematical induction revision time to explain the system to you.

Grade (Mark Range)
A (Atrocious) 70<
B (Bad!) 65-70
C (Cannot make it) 60-65
D (Dazzling) 55-60
E (Excellent) 50-55
AO (Ah! Outstanding!) 45-50
F (Fantastic) 45>

hopefully, all of you will do (F)antastically well for your prelims! haha